A Lifetime of Kisses
by starbuckfaerie21
Summary: The title says it all. Or at least it should.


A Lifetime of Kisses

 **Disclaimer:** Sadly, I own neither _Saving Hope_ nor Daniel Gillies.

 **Pairing:** Joel & Alex (or if you prefer) Alex & Joel.

 **Rating: T**

 **Summary:** The title says it all. Or at least it should.

Alex Reid awoke to the pleasant sensation of her husband's lips on her neck and his voice in her ear.

"Good morning Doctor Reid." Joel Goran whispered, brushing Alex's hair away from her face.

"Mmmmhmmmm…Good morning Doctor Goran. What time is it?" Alex whispered, drowsily. Even with her eyes closed she still managed to locate the mole behind Joel's ear and kiss it softly.

"Unfortunately, it's time to get up," Joel said, chuckling just a little bit as he listened to Alex's sleepy voice.

"Can't we just stay in bed a little bit longer?" Alex mumbled against his ear, pulling him closer.

 _Alex Reid you saucy minx._

 _I love you._

"Sure Reid. But only if you want to be late. We have to get the kids up and get ready to go…"

At the mere mention of their children Alex gave Joel another quick kiss and shot up out of bed.

"Oh my God…You're right… The kids. What was I thinking? Plus we have that fundraiser for the hospital tonight…"

"Yes, ma'am we do. And Zack and Malanda are watching the kids so you know what that means.

 _Dirty weekend._

Alex thought with a smile, as she got to her feet a little bit too quickly, and she would've fallen back into bed if Joel hadn't caught her.

"Whoa. Alex, are you all right?" Joel asked, wrapping an arm around her waist and giving her the once over.

Alex nodded, giving him a half-hearted smile, "Yeah, I just got a little lightheaded for a second. I probably just need to eat something."

Joel gave her a skeptical look, and she kissed him once more to reassure him, "Joel, baby, I'm fine. Now, I have to go get the kids up or we really _are_ going to be late."

"I'll go down and make us some breakfast." Joel replied, enjoying the view as he watched his wife turn around and walk toward the kids' rooms.

Fifteen minutes later, Joel was downstairs pouring coffee when Alex and the kids came down.

"Okay Luke and Charlotte, pick out your cereal, while I give your brother his bottle. Joel, baby help them pour the milk would you? Is that coffee?"

Joel nodded, pulling the half gallon of milk out of the fridge and pouring a little bit onto Luke's Cocoa Puffs and Charlotte's Lucky Charms.

"But I don't think you need any this morning Reid. Slow down, we're not late, yet. And as long as we get out of the house in the next half hour we're golden."

Alex shook her head and a strand of her dark hair fell in her face. "No, Joel. We _had_ a half hour. Now, we have fifteen minutes before Luke and Charlotte's bus gets here. And I haven't picked out a dress yet for the party tonight. And I haven't eaten anything…"

 _And there it is._

 _The inevitable breakdown that happens whenever she thinks she's going to be late._

Joel stopped the flow of her anxious words with a kiss, just as the bagel he'd put in the toaster for her popped up.

"Just breathe and eat your bagel, Reid. Everything's going to be fine. And for the record you could wear a paper bag and still look like a million bucks."

Alex couldn't help but smile as she took a bite of the bagel that he handed her and took a sip from the cup of coffee in his other hand.

 _God, I love my husband. He always knows just what to say._

"Just trying to keep up with you, Doctor Goran. I do love what you do to a suit." She said, after she swallowed.

"I appreciate the compliment Doctor Reid." Joel replied, reaching out to wipe a bagel crumb from the corner of her mouth.

"Do you guys have your backpacks?" Alex asked as she opened the fridge and took out both of her kids' lunches and setting them on the counter.

 _Ham & cheese for Luke._

 _Peanut butter & jelly for Charlotte._

Both children nodded their mouths still full of cereal. 

Alex nodded too, as she finished giving Theo his bottle and held him over her shoulder to burp him.

"Good. Now you guys go brush your teeth. Hurry up so you don't miss the bus." She said, said following the children up the stairs and into the bathroom so she could brush her daughter's shoulder length dark hair.

"Mommy will you braid my hair? Charlotte asked between mouthfuls of toothpaste.

Alex shook her head, "Not today sweet pickle. We don't have time. But I'll do it for you on Monday I promise."

"Okay." Charlotte agreed as she leaned forward to spit in the sink.

Luke finished brushing his teeth and Alex kissed his forehead before he headed downstairs.

"Have a good day, little man. Remember Zack and Malanda will be here with you guys tonight because Mommy and Daddy have to go to the fundraiser at the hospital. And don't forget your lunch. I love you."

"I know, Mom." Luke said rolling his eyes.

Alex quickly finished her daughter's ponytail, and kissed her forehead, "Have a good day. Love you."

"Love you, too, Mommy." Charlotte said before she turned and left the bathroom.

"Joel, can you walk them to the bus?" Alex called before heading into the bedroom to select a dress for the fundraiser.

"You got it, "Joel shouted back, "Come on guys the bus is turning the corner."

Alex didn't hear the children reply. But she heard the front door close as they followed Joel outside.

Alex stepped into the master bedroom and stood in front of her walk-in closet, "Okay, Teddy bear, I need your help. What color dress should Mommy wear tonight?"

She touched the fabric of several different evening dresses but none of them seemed quite right.

 _Which one would Joel like?_

 _Just pick one, Reid._

 _It doesn't matter._

 _He'll tell me I look like a million bucks no matter which one I wear._

 _I want to look good for him._

Her son cooed happily as she gently bounced him on her hip.

She was just about to give up, overwhelmed by too many choices when her fingers brushed against the forest green silk of a dress that she'd worn on one of her very first dates with Joel shortly after they'd gotten back together.

She still remembered the way he looked at her when she walked into the restaurant that night.

And the way he'd placed his jacket over her shoulders just before they'd left.

She was nervous and had drunk too much pinot noir as a result.

He'd driven her home and been a perfect gentleman.

But his kiss goodnight had left her wanting more.

She wanted a lifetime of kisses from Joel Goran.

 _This is it._

 _This is the one._

She took the dress out of the closet, still in the zipped garment bag, and grabbed a black cardigan and black kitten heels to complete the ensemble.

The baby was sound asleep against her shoulder by the time she made it downstairs.

She suddenly felt lightheaded again and had to brace herself against the kitchen counter for a few seconds.

She'd just gotten her bearings when Joel came back inside, "The kids are on their way to school."

"Thank you," She whispered pulling him close and giving him a long kiss.

 _A lifetime of kisses._

"Reid, if you keep that up we _really will_ be late because I'll have to take you upstairs and ravage you before we even make it out the door."

Alex smiled, "I know. I just wanted to let you know how much I love you."

He flashed her one of his trademark Joel Goran grins. "I love you too, Alex. But we really do have to go."

He pressed a kiss against her neck, his lips brushing her carotid artery.

 _Her pulse is racing._

"Hey, " He whispered, putting his hand on her shoulder and turning her halfway around so she'd look at him, "Why's your heart beating so fast?"

"It's just you," She replied, with a smile, "Did you get your suit for tonight?"

 _Nice try, Reid._

 _She's changing the subject._

"Yes, ma'am. It's already in the car."

"Well then let's go. I'll put the baby in the back. You drive?" She asked, opening the trunk and placing the garment bag and accessories inside.

Joel nodded, "It's because I drive faster than you isn't it, Reid?"

"Yes, Joel, " She whispered, her breath catching in her throat for a moment another wave of dizziness washed over her and she had to brace herself against the open car door for balance.

The beginning of his grin disappeared, "Alex, love, tell me what's wrong." He said, taking their son from her arms and placing him in the car seat and fastening the straps.

"C'mere. Sit down." His voice was suddenly very soft in her ear as he put his arm around her waist and eased her into the passenger seat.

"Joel, baby I'm all right. I feel ridiculous. It was probably just too much coffee."

Her husband shook his head, "Reid, you and I both know that caffeine isn't the problem here."

"Now we really _are_ going to be late." Alex murmured leaning back against the seat.

Joel laid a hand on her arm, "Don't worry about that, now. Just breathe."

Suddenly the answer clicked in his mind.

 _Her arrhythmia_.

He tried not to think about it too often because it reminded him of the time when he'd almost lost her.

 _When she'd been stabbed by a patient._

 _His patient._

 _On his watch._

 _It was his fault._

Alex repeatedly told him not to blame himself, but he knew he would always feel responsible for what happened to her.

She preferred to see it as a blessing in disguise, and when he did that he could almost forgive himself.

 _If she hadn't been stabbed they might've never gotten back together._

 _Or gotten married._

 _Or had their children._

Joel shook his head to clear away the thought of his life without Alex in it.

 _I'm never doing that again._

 _I want a lifetime with Alex Reid._

 _A lifetime of kisses._

 _A lifetime of dirty weekends._

 _A lifetime of birthdays._

 _A lifetime of watching their children grow up._

"The minute we get to the hospital have Dawn take a look at you." Joel said his voice low and serious."

Alex nodded; "I know what you're thinking because I was thinking it too. I didn't want to tell you because I was scared and telling you would've made it real."

Joel grabbed her hand and held it tight enough to make her look at him, "You can always tell me anything. Now, let's go to work."

After they arrived at the hospital, Alex sat in Dawn's office being fitted for the now familiar heart monitor.

"Wear this for forty-eight hours. And don't take it off." Dawn said, as she stood next to Alex, her heels making the leggy blonde cardiothoracic surgeon seem taller, even though the two women were approximately the same height.

 _It's funny how Dawn seems a lot less intimidating now._

Alex thought as she walked out of the office toward the elevator.

She smiled as the doors opened to reveal Joel standing inside.

"Hey." What did Dawn say?" He asked softly.

She shrugged, "She turned me into a robot." She replied, feeling her nerves calm the moment his hand brushed her arm.

"A sexy robot." Joel whispered, his voice in her ear, making her shiver with desire.

"Just so I'm prepared, exactly how hot is the dress you're going to be wearing tonight, Doctor Reid?"

Alex smiled, "I'm sure it's not as hot as the suit you'll be wearing, Doctor Goran. You'd make a fantastic James Bond."

"Alex Reid, I do believe you're dodging the question."

Just before the elevator stopped, Alex turned to him and smiled, giving him a quick kiss.

 _I want a lifetime of kisses from Alex Reid._

"Well Joel Goran, you're just going to have to wait until tonight to find out. I'll meet you in the lobby at seven and we'll go to the hotel?"

"Yes ma'am." Joel replied, kissing her softly, and smiling as he watched her walk away.

At the end of the day, Alex let out an exhausted sigh as she ducked into the on-call room to change out of her scrubs and into her dress.

She reached into her purse for the travel size bottle of perfume and sprayed some of each of her wrists and on both sides of her neck.

She brushed her hair and swept it up into a clip at the nape of her neck, leaving a few tendrils hanging loose so that Joel would reach out and tenderly sweep them aside.

She checked her makeup in the small mirror and switched her sneakers for the heels, and slipped on her black cardigan before she left the on-call room and headed for the elevator.

Joel waited in the lobby impeccably dressed in a suit reading yesterday's newspaper. He let out a low whistle of appreciation as Alex got off the elevator and walked towards him.

"Wow," Joel said flashing her one of his trademark grins, "You look like a million bucks, Reid. I remember that dress."

"You do?" Alex said, walking towards him and let out a contented sigh as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

 _I never forget anything when it comes to you._

Joel nodded, "Yeah, and I remember how adorably clumsy you were because you were so nervous.

"It was right after we got back together. I was so afraid we'd fall back into old patterns." She pulled him closer, and whispered, "I'm glad we didn't."

 _It wasn't you, Reid. It was me. I'm the one who screwed everything up. And I'm going to spend a lifetime making it up to you._

"Me too." He replied, holding the door open as they left the hospital and headed toward the car.

"Do you still have your monitor on?" Joel asked, unlocking the car, and getting into the driver's seat while Alex got in on the passenger side.

"Yes…Malanda called. She picked up Theo and went back to the house. Zack brought Jacob over so Luke is going to have a good time. The kids wanted pizza…She asked me if it was okay. I told her…"

 _She's trying to change the subject again._

"Alex," Joel interrupted, kissing her so she couldn't speak, "I'm glad the kids are fine. But how are _you_ feeling?"

She sighed, "Joel, baby I'm fine. Now can we _please_ go eat overpriced rubbery chicken and dance and discuss anything other than my heart arrhythmia?"

"You got it," Joel replied, as he started the car without letting go of her hand.

Joel couldn't take his eyes off of Alex throughout the whole evening.

Her cheeks were flushed from the wine and his attention.

"Doctor Goran what are you looking at? You can't see the monitor can you?" She asked, taking a sip from her wine glass, and suddenly feeling self-conscious.

"The most beautiful thing in the room, Doctor Reid. You know I kind of wish we would've booked a room so we could have a dirty weekend."

Alex shook her head, "Alas it was not to be. Maybe next weekend?"

She leaned toward him and pressed her lips against the mole behind his ear. "I'd rather make love in our bed anyway."

Joel pressed his lips against her neck, and whispered, "I'd make love to you anytime, anywhere Reid."

Alex felt a shiver of desire run through her body, "Well we can't do that. But we can do the next best thing." She said softly, getting to her feet and reaching for his hand as orchestral music began to play throughout the ballroom. We can dance."

"Yes, ma'am. We certainly can." He replied, rising and walking with her onto the dance floor.

"Joel, I love you," She whispered, as they began to dance.

"I love you too, Alex," He said as they spun and dipped their way across the floor and he relished in the sound of her laughter and the warmth of body against his.

It happened in seconds.

One moment he was dipping her and staring into her beautiful eyes.

And the next moment her eyes were dancing back and forth in panic, her breath coming in short desperate gasps.

"Alex, what is it? What's wrong?"

"Joel baby, I can't breathe…"

He reached beneath the bodice of her dress to look at the monitor.

"All right, love. Just hang on. Keep your eyes open. Just stay with me."

Then she suddenly went limp and he lowered her onto the floor, tilting her head back to clear her airway as he began to compress her chest and breathe into her mouth.

 _One_

"Alex, c'mon. Don't you leave me."

 _Two_

"Alex, the kids need you."

 _Three._

"I need you."

 _Four._

"You're staying here with me. Do you hear me, Alex Reid? You belong here."

He repeated the same words he'd said to her when she'd been in the coma after the stabbing.

Suddenly he thought of the other thing he'd done that had brought her back to consciousness.

 _Five_.

As he compressed her chest one last time, he pressed his lips against hers.

 _She wasn't gone._

 _She couldn't be._

 _They had a lifetime of kisses yet to share._

And at that moment she opened her eyes, looking up at him uncertainly, "Joel baby, what happened?"

He smiled, checking the readings of the heart monitor that were once again within normal range.

Then he pulled slowly pulled her to her feet, "You came back to me, Reid."


End file.
